Roar to you, UPS

Company: United Postal services (UPS).

Roar Rating: 3.0 roars.

Scale:  Fire-->5 roars-->4 roars-->3 roars-->2 roars-->1 roar-->1 purr-->2 purrs-->3 purrs-->4 purrs-->5 purrs 

(Fire is so awful you should run away gibbering. 5 roars is as bad as it gets, don't even bother with the product or service. 5 purrs is so good you should drop what you're doing and run and get whatever I'm talking about.)

    Today I had the most astonishing thing happen. Yesterday I received a little slip stuck to my door, saying that USP failed to deliver a package that did not require a signature.  Hm. Nice to know. So I called them to ask why, and to request that the package be left at my door today.

   I unexpectedly entered a realm of fear that felt like the Consumer Twilight Zone. Let's see if I can describe my increasing surprise and unease as I learn that once again, not only am I just one of many cogs* to be milked for my middle class cash, but the nice big Company that is supposed to exist to serve me, and has such friendly customer service, is actually just presenting a veneer of pleasantness while they slowly fleece me AND provide inferior service.

   First of all, the customer service rep could not find my account, then found it, and it had all the incorrect information, etc etc etc. She pleasantly told me that if I signed up for the new UPS service, "UPS MyChoice", I could request that the package, which may I reiterate did not require a signature anyhow, could be left at my door.

   Ok, I bite. I sign up. First the procedure looks innocuous: name, address, phone number. Fine. Then they want my birthdate, which a pop-up assures me must be given correctly because UPS will use it to verify me, and they will not save it. Hmm, what? They won't? And why would a company which delivers packages need my birthdate? So I use my standard false one, which I assume by now some secret consumer database has associated with my social security number anyhow. Privacy is dead people. Get over it, I've heard it said. I say not.

   Anyhow, on the next page - this blew me away - I received the same triumvirate of questions as I get from the credit agencies to verify my identity. This is UPS!!! Where'd they get access to this information?  They asked me what is the address of the property I own, which street I have lived on in the past, what county I live in now (which they had wrong, and I know why, and it's not good that they had that). Scary? You bet.

  There's more. Remember, this UPS MyChoice was billed as a service to allow easier access to manage my deliveries by UPS. Right? OK. So after my heart attack, I try to give permission to leave that blasted package at my door, just as I and the shipper intended. And I paid for shipping already, remember. Well - here's the kicker. UPS requires payment for this! Right! Payment! UPS MyChoice  is a service that you pay annually for. Now they have all my information - which they can sell, if they like - and they want me to pay to SCHEDULE TO LEAVE A PACKAGE I PAID SHIPPING ON ALREADY!! Sorry to yell. I'm that shocked.

   So naturally I call UPS again, and get another fembot who pleasantly tells me she can't help me, she has no idea why the package wasn't left yesterday anyhow, and that it is up to the drivers discretion as to whether or not to leave the package if the customer is not at home. So UPS is not responsible for delivering the package late because I was not home.

  You see where this is going in terms of added charges, don't you? Here's Regina's prediction. UPS will eventually just not be leaving packages unless you're home, and if you wish to schedule otherwise, well - they have a handy service where you pay them more and they allow you to tell the driver something obvious - that they can leave the package at your door. You know, like a delivery service.

  I'm still amazed that UPS had access to my entire physical address history, and "needed" my birthdate to sign me up for this service - before they even whispered that it might cost me something.  I am roaring in consumeristic outrage. 3.0 roars for this one.



* yeah, I meant cogs and not cows. Hello, mixed metaphor. I just feel more like a cog than a cow.

Verizon gets Roared

Carrier: Verizon.

Roar Rating: 2.5 roars.

Scale:  Fire-->5 roars-->4 roars-->3 roars-->2 roars-->1 roar-->1 purr-->2 purrs-->3 purrs-->4 purrs-->5 purrs 

(Fire is so awful you should run away gibbering. 5 roars is as bad as it gets, don't even bother with the product or service. 5 purrs is so good you should drop what you're doing and run and get whatever I'm talking about.)

    I have been a loyal customer of Verizon for 6 years now, and that's a lot of time in telecommunication-land. I liked them fine, and haven't felt a need to peep about them at all. Others may have their difficulties with their carriers, but me and Verizon were pals. Problems with minutes? Here's some free ones, on us! Unexpected service charge? Here's a little credit! We love you, ReginaRoars! So, I've been purring for years. Until August 11, 2011. When Everything Changed.

   I innocently treated myself to the well-reviewed Samsung Charge (please see my review on this blog) and my life hasn't been the same since. I also purchased - as a treat mind you - the Galaxy Tab. Review to come, and this litttle gem does not exceed the quality of the Charge. Horrifyingly not.

    Since I bought these items from Verizon, I expect them to have, you know, service available. And warranties. To be fixed if necessary. And as both of these items are a tad pricey, to expect some amount of alarcrity on any fixes, and courteous service, and customer service who could actually understand descriptions of my complaints. Whooo baby, I got none of that.

   I have been on the phone (ironically) with Verizon regarding the problems that you, dear blog Reader, know about. This has literally taken up 6 phone sessions ranging from 1 to 4 - yes FOUR - hours each. I finally went to a store and the problems remain unsolved.

   The nastiest, most egregiously unhelpful yet disarmingly pleasant person was the Verizon manager Brandon, in Chandler, AZ. He swore up and down to fix my tablet by personally sheparding it through the system at Verizon, and assist with all my issues and obvert any delays. Brandon got me off the phone after one of the 4 hour life-wasting sessions I had with Verizon, scheduled to call me back on November 14 at 3pm, and simply disappeared- he did not notate my account, call me, or facilitate my tab repair in any way. I had to start the inquiry from scratch.

   The particulars are not important, what I think is alarming is the increasing lack of sensible customer service, the almost ubiquitous "customer representatives" (who really represent and protect the company that pays them) who don't give a damn, the acceptance of their flat-out lying to the customer (I highly doubt Brandon will get fired or even admonished for his conduct), and the difficulty of being able to make a complaint as to how one is treated - for example, even though I knew Brandon's phone number and identity, I could not file a complaint with Corporate - because Brandon didn't notate my account!! Clearly this makes notating a customer's account a liability for the employee. And this becomes just another factor degrading the service we, the customers, receive.

    So, yes, Regina simply roars at Verizon. You guys listening, or just making profits? By the way, gentle blog reader, I really feel a need to clarify - I happen to be in favor of businesses making profits, because why else would they be in business? It's not inherently bad to make money or charge consumers for what you make or provide. In fact, I think it's good. It gives potential new businesses the incentive to do the hard work of initiating and growing a business - no mean feat in a fair marketplace. And Verizon used to provide me a service I needed and could not provide for myself in a reasonably priced and fair manner. Lovely capitalism: I pay them and they give me, in exchange for my money,  a service at a price that is resonable. Cool! But the marketplace, and Big Business in America, has been quickly evolving to carry out a series of small practices all of which are predatory - and result in unreasonably high costs to the consumer for unreasonably low value, while corporate executives make large profits which they did not earn in the sense of providing something of value for a fair price. Their prices are not fair. This is not how capitalism is designed to work because, as a consumer, I'm no longer directly able to vote with my dollars. I'm stuck with Verizon in this case due to both their 2-year contract, and also the fact that the equipment only works on Verizon service and is non-returnable. I invested $950 in equipment and cannot cancel the service for the length of my contract with them, whether I have the equipment or not. That's an effective monopoly, and they are abusing the customer-provider relationship. It's that simple.

Galaxy Tab is roarworthy

Device: Samsung Galaxy Tab. Runs Android. Carrier Verizon.

Roar Rating: 2.0 roars.

Scale:  Fire-->5 roars-->4 roars-->3 roars-->2 roars-->1 roar-->1 purr-->2 purrs-->3 purrs-->4 purrs-->5 purrs 

(Fire is so awful you should run away gibbering. 5 roars is as bad as it gets, don't even bother with the product or service. 5 purrs is so good you should drop what you're doing and run and get whatever I'm talking about.)

    Everyone likes tablets. Tablets are sexy! Tablets are cool! Obviously, I wanted one, and I wanted to have the coolest, fastest, bestest one, so I did my research and decided on the Galaxy Tab. Wow, right? Two cameras, blazing fast, great 10' screen, runs Flash, I mean - hold me back! I'm never gonna log off this puppy. I brought it home from the Verizon Store in its nice sturdy little box, charged it up and the trouble started almost instantaneously.

   Maybe my first clue should have been that I bought this Door into Tomorrow the very same day I exchanged my Samsung Charge - you all know the party that that was. Maybe the second clue should have been that I was secretly charged an "activation fee" -- after the Verizon sales guy assured me that would be waived. Maybe the third clue should have been --- oh wait, I'm skipping the story.

   I could list all the malfunctions and irritations of this device, which would be nifty if it worked as advertised. I will quickly say it launches apps without asking me, reboots after I put it to sleep, insists on making word-completion and overrides my corrections (which wastes a lot of time), is extremely slow, does not save pages like a laptop (I know, who said it would?), and a dozen or so other irritations. It's nothing like as useful as even an inexpensive laptop, you can't edit or write much due to the lack of software that is comfortable and reliable, it has clumsy tools for saving text, and right now, even a Kindle Fire would be more reliable and useful based on my trials of those cuties. The Samsung Galaxy Tab has trouble finding a signal and often cannot find the mystical and inexplicably slow-in-NYC 4G signal even when my phone has a 4G connection and is right next to the tablet.

   But more than sharing my experience with you, Dear Blog Reader, I want to also add that Verizon has made exchanging this recalcitrant device all but impossible. A warranty? Ha! they scoff at warranties. They eats them for breakfast, and picks their teeth with your service agreement.

   My first big error was that I let the all-critical 14 day evaluation period, when exchanges are supposedly allowed at the store (if they, you know, believe you. And can replicate the problem. That's a big problem if you have an intermittent or geographical problem) pass by. I had the flu, if you must know, but I'm not offering excuses. The alloted 14 days passed, and I passed with them into the Kingdom of the Difficulties with Verizon.

   On the phone, I described that my tablet had developed Newton's Rings, a manufacturing error that makes the screen hard to read. This is a definite flaw. Newton's Rings bigger than a square inch are considered by Samsung grounds for immediate replacment of the unit. But my warranty was fulfilled by Verizon and they would not exchange the unit at a store. They would only exchange it by me waiting a good 70 minutes to get to a technician who I then had to educate as to what Newton's Rings were, and I eventually convinced him I knew what I was talking about and deserved a new tablet. So he shipped me a shipping-box overnight.

   The box never arrived because FedEX, in agreement only with Verizon, will not leave even an empty box in NYC unless it is signed for. Now please note, I receive FedEx deliveries all the time which are left at my door. This agreement of non-leaving FedEx deliveries is solely with Verizon.

   Could Verizon help with this, as I am not always home? They would not let me leave the tablet at a store, would not pick it up or deliver it elsewhere, would not allow FedEx to leave the box even if I would agree to absorb the loss if the box were stolen. I finally received the box by accident, because my flu relapsed and while I was wrangling with Verizon, wasting hours speaking with managers and customer service reps over 3 woeful evenings. FedEx came over the next day while I was stuck home with a fever. So now I have the fateful box.

  But when I return the tablet in this nice box, I fear I will never see it returned. FedEx won't leave the package from Verizon unless I'm home. Verizon doesn't care if and when I receive it, and won't help by, for example, shipping it priority morning delivery even if I pay for that. So in steps Customer Service Manager Guy - Brandon.

  During a marathon 2 hour call (95 minutes on hold, naturally) Brandon promised he would assist in the shipment, repair and delivery of my tablet and be certain to get it back to me. He said he would call  me to arrange. He made me happy, was pleasant understanding and friendly, and said we would start the process over the next week after the weekend so he would be around. We had a date for him to call me, and during the long negotiation to set this up, he asked if I would show him around New York City if he ever visited, and we discussed the magic that is New York City during the holidays. Brandon was friendly.

  And he never called.

  The kicker? I have to start from scratch with the repair. Brandon made no record at Verizon and cannot be reprimanded. I referred to this in another blog post.

  So I still have my tablet, which is no longer my friend, and it still has Newton's Rings, and I am out $650 because its aggregate flaws make it virtually unusable. Most irritating is that Verizon once again provided customer service with a smile while doing nothing of substance.

   Which is actually what this post is about. Not the tablet. Or slow 4G. Or the manufacturing vicissitudes of electronic devices. It is about the precipitous drop in customer service from all major corporations that I have had experience with, and how that has only accelerated in the past year or so. The companies have learned they can make and retain profits by providing friendly but spineless customer service. 

Roaring is good (Read this first!)

 
   Wow, I really hate my new Droid Charge. And don't get me started on the Galaxy Tab. Hey - have you seen those pop-up ads on the U.S. Post Office's web site? What's up with that?? And, let me tell you what I noticed about the decline in quality of the Big 5 chocolate products. Ooooo. Wait, wait, wait. Have you waited on hold for a grillion hours for customer service? Have you noticed thinner shopping bags when you shop? How about all those sneaky new bank charges? I know you noticed those.

   This blog is to share my experiences in the grand American consumer marketplace. It's an adventure lately. Really. I remember when there were unspoken but still existing rules in the marketplace, a time when one could shop and implicitly expect certain things. Like the store would not sell your name to others, or even ask for it. Like if something said something on the box, you didn't have to read it with your lawyer to make sure you bought what you thought you were buying. Like if you used a credit card, you didn't have to wonder if there would be secret overdraft charges that you would discover later.

   But for now, this blog will be concerned with bad, evil, poor technology. I have a lot to say about Samsung, for example. And about 4G. And about the evolution of telecommunications companies and their relationship with consumers. Is your overpriced service slow, bad or down? Too bad! Maybe a technician will come by sometime. Maybe the company will say they tested your line or device and say it works fine - while you continue to have no service, or noise on your line, which squirrels ate through after all. Maybe customer service will cheerfully inform you that you can return your device but they might charge you $299 to fix it - at their discretion - and with no requirement to prove to you why they're charging it, and you cannot stop this if you need to have a device fixed! You know, as per the warranty.

  Blogging about this can be funny, and maybe informative, but maybe also induce reflection. The marketplace is actually, really yours. A lot of these predatory practices evolved over the last 25 years because each little irritation from whichever corporation or service provider - Verizon, banks, cable companies, even, sadly, your physician - is annoying, but we keep buying their stuff. Sometimes that's due to the existence of monopolies, like with cable companies, or the "early termination fee" for telecommunication devices, which effectively creates a time-limited monopoly for 2 years per customer. But sometimes, we're affronted but lazy. We have kids, work, and lives which make it too disruptive to fight back as consumers for what we know is right.

  Here's my thought. It has gotten so that the marketplace is a literal jungle, products are of poorer quality than we expect, and customer service costs so much time on hold and is of such poor quality that we don't pursue it. Think of where this will go in the future if the corporations see us, their customers, as tolerating this. They will provide what we will pay for. Be aware of when an issue of poor quality or bad service, or just unbelievable disrespect of you as a customer, is a systemic problem. By pushing back we will get a more equitable marketplace.

   Meanwhile, I will tell you why Regina Says This Sucks. Welcome.

Roaring about the Samsung Charge

Device: Samsung Charge. Runs Android, Froyo. Carrier Verizon.

Roar Rating: 2.5 roars.

Scale:  Fire-->5 roars-->4 roars-->3 roars-->2 roars-->1 roar-->1 purr-->2 purrs-->3 purrs-->4 purrs-->5 purrs 
(Fire is so awful you should run away gibbering. 5 roars is as bad as it gets, don't even bother with the product or service. 5 purrs is so good you should drop what you're doing and run and get whatever I'm talking about.)


 So, I was really excited a few months ago to get a top of the line smartphone, the Samsung Charge! The reviews were pretty good to excellent - the specs and links to a few reviews are below so you can see that for yourself.

  I get this baby home and start to play. Um. I can't get 4G. It crashes every hour. Using the camera crashes the phone. The touchscreen doesn't respond. What the what? So I bring it back to the store where they assure me it's perfect, and refuse to exchange it. Yelling, crying, and a head bonk on the counter ensued but the manager remained firm. Fine. Then I said I would return it, eat the $35 restocking fee, and leave on the river of tears I cried while I was there. OMG! Suddenly the manager can exchange my phone, no fee, so sorry! I should have refused, but I am a sucker.

   Now I have this replacement "smart"phone, and please note that Verizon doesn't allow more than 2 device exchanges. They know what they're doing. This new Charge, contrary to the store manager's assertions that the previous one was perfect, is actually much better. But, holy cow, I have to say it, Regina Says It Sucks anyway. Why? Ok. First of all, it gets "4G", which I think someone made up, about 10% of the time, and I notice nothing discernible in the function or speed of the phone between 4G and 3G. It may have a super-duper AMOLED screen, but somehow the software turns down the brightness all the time. BY ITSELF. The camera crashes the phone so that it needs a hard reset at least once a week, and I lose charming pictures all the time. The delay between photos is so long - like 8 seconds - you can forget about snapping two shots, because by that time the person (or animal, or event) has moved away, or grown older, or forgotten you.  I was taking pictures at the Greenwich Village Halloween parade, and I took a phot of a scary monster. While I was studiously staring at my screen to see if the damn photo came out, in real life the monster reached over the barrier (causing gleeful screaming all around me, but of course - I didn't notice. I was busy) to mock-grab my phone. Did I see this? No. Then when I realized what was going on (as the crowd moved away from me), I was thrilled and scared and delighted and decided to take a photo of this unique moment! And my phone crashed. Samsung Charge: 1 Regina: 0.

   Oh, there's more. The ringer doesn't always work. Now, I thought that how the phone let me know I was getting a call is by ringing. Right? Maybe the designers had a different idea. I can't be sure. But I miss a lot of calls.

   The battery life on this device is well known for being short, but c'mon. It's about 5 hours. I can't go anywhere without my recharger. I previously had a first generation Droid and I never ever carried the charger. Now I simply Don't Leave Home Without it. I know where the plugs are in diners all over Manhattan. Sigh. And, it takes a loooong time to recharge. Far longer than my Motorola Gen 1 Droid, what's up with that, engineers?

     Random annoying and very real software issues that I have no idea how they slipped through the designers, uh...fingers so to speak: clock has non-intuitive repeat feature, and one can easily think they are setting the alarm for the next morning - and have the alarm actually set for a week from the next morning. Disconcerting. I've had apps simply disappear, and other apps launch randomly all by themselves. The home page doesn't stay set and randomly changes. I've had the contacts lose numbers I use a lot. Sometimes the touchscreen will just go dark while I'm using it so I can't make any commands at all and have to reboot the phone. Whaddup wit dat, Samsung? And, sometimes the screen doesn't dim by itself after I've used the phone, and just sits there, mocking me, wasting the battery. Sometimes I can't swipe the lock screen off and have to - you guessed it - hard reboot. This phone has a mind of its own. Wait - I wonder if it does? It seems to. Now I'm scared, a little.

  Yes, there's more. You can't edit photos on the phone like you could with my old smartphone, that good old solid Motorola Droid which never bothered me in any way. The Google Maps app loses the GPS signal all the time. My older droid rarely failed me, but this one loses me all over the country. I would be better off leaving a trail of breadcrumbs, and the birds would like me better too. Hmm, I wonder if there's an app for that?

  That's not a comprehensive list, but you get the picture. The phone is definitely -- interesting. So, this device not only gets 2.5 roars, but I have to wonder what all the other reviewers were thinking. I just can't wait to upgrade this clunky, bossy piece of hardware. You hear that, little Samsung Charge? You're toast. Just please keep working until my contract runs out.


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http://reviews.cnet.com/smartphones/samsung-droid-charge-verizon/4505-6452_7-34468678.html
http://tinyurl.com/c3eqnzw
http://www.bgr.com/2011/05/09/samsung-droid-charge-review/
http://phandroid.com/2011/05/02/samsung-droid-charge-review/